These are the words from the song in one good Russian movie. I think I can relate that to what happened in my game on Monday.

I played with an expert to whom I lost 3 times before. But in the last game I missed a simple deflection that was winning the game. This game was somewhat similar, missing a chance due to a time pressure.

He had White, I played Slav again. I think it suits my style, but I definitely should study it more. I think I was OK after the opening, though was feeling some pressure. I spent quite some time thinking how to defend against his 21. Nd6 and computer confirms that f6 was a good idea. Maybe I got tired defending, on the move 31 I blundered a pawn. Then 37… Nh3 was another blunder because I was losing this knight after 38. Re5 Qh6 39. Kg2 and if 39… Ng5 then 40. Qd5. He didn’t see it. After 41. hxg3 I decided to play Nxf4. It was more of an intuitive sacrifice and I had very little, 20-30 seconds, time left. Computer suggests the same move. So after gxf4 I automatically play Rxf4 and it blinked a bit later in my mind that Qh4+ was possible. Of course I had to play Qh4+, winning a rook,  computer says it is still a draw. Though, I am sure how he would react on that strike, also having not much time.

After his 43. Qe3 I missed another strike  – 43… Rxe4 and if  44. Qxe4 then 44… Rf1+, so he has to reply with 44. Qh3+ and I am a pawn up. Looking at this now I am just shaking my head, but at least you can’t require somebody to see this having just seconds left. Instead I made that stupid check on f1, because it seemed to me that I can mate him or win his queen. Of course, nothing like that happened, he forced queens exchange and after some meaningless resistance in the endgame I resigned.

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